Gromet's PlazaTG/CD Stories

Not Careful Enough

by TanyaCD

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© Copyright 2023 - TanyaCD - Used by permission

Storycodes: Sbm; mpov; cd; M2f; chastity; public; nylons; caught; bond; oral; cons; X


I have been into cross dressing and self bondage for my entire adult life. I was a definite candidate to be controlled by a strong willed woman in a Female Led Relationship. I have often wondered just how compliant I would have become with the right coaxing. I read so many stories of FLR and how totally submissive the males become. It is just fiction right, no one would actually go that far - would they?

I was starting to get along in years and my current partner was certain to be my last. She did not have a dominant bone in her body, so I knew that my mainstream life was never going to include the sort of control that I was so curious about. As much as I thought it might be the life for me, I was resigned to the fact that it would never be.

So my self bondage and crossdressing sessions would have to suffice, along with the almost constant daydreams of how different my life might have been. Those daydreams were triggered by everyday occurrences.

I run my own business, a retail outlet situated in a small commercial building in the suburbs. My desk is situated such that not only do I see every customer that enters my shop, but my peripheral vision notices everyone walking to or from every other business in the building.

People that I see get immediately categorized in my mind - it just happens without me intending to do it. The most common classification is a non descript one. These are just people going about their normal life and nothing about them seems to relate to my life at all. The second category are those that I envy. These are always women and there is something about their appearance that invokes instant jealousy. Anything from the shoes they are wearing to their hairstyle or their nail polish. The cross dresser in me so wishes that my everyday life would enable me such luxuries. The third and least frequent category are women that instantly invoke submissive feelings. I am yet to succinctly identify what it is about these women, but I immediately recognise that they are in some way superior to me and I should behave accordingly in their presence. When such a woman is also a customer, my attitude seems so different toward them. Of course I try to provide excellent customer service to everyone, but I most certainly try harder for these superior women. I also wonder if my different attitude is noticeable to my female employee - who I have not viewed in this light.

Of late, I have been giving in to urges more frequently. From the cross dressing side of things, I have sought out professional dominants to create an environment where I am forced to dress more femininely more often. The word forced is probably misused here as really it is things that I yearn to do. However, when someone else has a way of leveraging me, it means that my conscience does not get as much say in my decision making. I just tend to do, more than think. And the real me is more prevalent. Currently, I am locked in a chastity cage 24/7 with no access to the key. A professional Mistress holds the only keys. I will not be unlocked until I have earned enough points. Points are earned by doing various activities in feminine mode. So these days, I do all my errands fully dressed. Banking, grocery shopping, filling the car with petrol. Pretty much everything.

Because I have to be fully dressed so much these days, I have become much less concerned of the risks of being seen. It is being recognised that would be a problem. Being seen is actually a buzz. Being spotted as a crossdresser also does not worry me - in fact that is rather exciting, although it is still a bit risky. The other day, I was in the supermarket and a man walked past me. As he passed he told me to put a bullet through my head. It did not phase me, I was on a high, which I generally am when in public dressed. I mean an emotional high, not just physically high because of the fact that I love to wear seriously high heels at every opportunity.

So, nowadays, I tend to just get dressed in the shop when alone there and come and go from the shop en femme. I am careful, as much as possible, to avoid other tenants seeing me, but not everything is within my control. Generally this dressing is outside normal business hours, so not only have my staff gone, but also pretty much everyone else in the building.

One evening when I needed petrol, I decided to get dressed before leaving the shop. Most of my female attire is kept in a storeroom off the downstairs carpark. I went down and collected what I needed. I noticed that there was only one other car in the car park. I recognised it as belonging to Esther, who used one of the other units in the building. When I came back upstairs - I could see that her's was the only unit still with lights on. As has become standard, I assessed this level of risk as acceptable. I would be unlucky to be leaving at the same time as the only other person still in the building. So I got dressed, planning to just walk down to my car and head off. By the time I would get back, I considered that she would be gone and walking back into my shop en femme would not be an issue. Even if she was not gone by then, it was just one person and the odds were still on my side.

I got dressed and was locking my shop when I noticed that her lights were off. I figured she had left while I was getting changed. I then locked the building's front door before going down the back stairs to my car. To my surprise Esther's black Mercedes Coupe was still in the carpark. I concluded that she must have gone somewhere on foot after leaving her unit and would collect her car shortly. I walked past the front of her car to get to my own. I got into my car and found the remote for the car park gate. Pressed the button to open the gate and then started my car. At almost the same time I saw the lights on Esther's car come on. She must have been sitting in her car when I walked past it. No way she could not have noticed me, given I was wearing stilettos on a concrete floor. And there are so few of us in the building, we all know each other's cars. Her car has heavily tinted windows, so I am not surprised that I did not notice her. I drove off and she followed me out of the car park. We have spoken a few times since and nothing has been said.

Having been locked up for a few weeks now, the self bondage urges have been stronger and I have started to undertake some activities in the period between closing the shop and going home. Throughout my life, self bondage activities have tended to happen in clusters with each cluster centring around a theme. Usually I get partially dressed (feminine), apply some bondage and imagine being caught. My most erogenous zone is my nipples. Firm clamping and tugging on the nipples never fails to have an effect down below. And it has pretty much gotten to the point where I struggle to get erect without nipple play. So my self bondage games always involve nipple clamps. I have not been one to set up release mechanisms. I tend to just endure for a little while and then choose to stop playing when other urges take over my mind.

I do sometimes get a bit carried away with trying to make the bondage difficult to escape from. One time, many years ago, I just could not seem to get free, so had to ring a friend to come release me. That was very difficult to achieve, tied as I was. I chose her thinking that just maybe she might want to take things further. But she just released me - expressed surprise and left it at that. On another occasion I thought of a way that might be difficult to get out of. It was really difficult to get the bondage finalised, but I was right it was difficult to get out of. My hands were tied in such a way that each hand was effectively attached to a nipple and moving the hand pulled on the nipple. I spent about 20 minutes trying to manipulate the tie to escape but without success. Eventually I gave up and hunted for scissors. I had not pre-planned for scissors, so finding them and getting hold of them bound as I was was really difficult. Using the scissors was even harder, but after some time, I finally had the scissors open with one side, either side of the ribbon that was binding me. But as I was bound with ribbon, not rope, the material was so thin that it could slide between the blades of the scissors. As much as I opened and closed the scissors, which was very difficult, no cutting was happening. The blades were just being forced apart on either side of the taut ribbon. By this time, I thought I was defeated and would have to summon help again. Having moved interstate since the last mishap, I could not use the same person, and I could not think of anyone to call. My nipples were screaming in pain by this stage and my mind was frantically trying to think of a way out with minimal long term impact. I resolved to find a stronger pair of scissors. After some time, this thought led to success, but I was left thinking of what could have been.

Back to the present (this story is starting to resemble a Ronnie Corbett joke - lots of digressions). My latest cluster of sessions has resolved around a theme of learning to deep throat. A curious theme given that I have yet to see a man that I feel attracted to. I have never claimed that all my thoughts and actions are consistent - whatever seems like a good idea at the time. I purchased a 6 inch flexible dildo and started practicing some oral skills under instruction from my Mistress. I was very surprised at how quickly I was able to take the entire length into my mouth. It was quite slim, so even though it reached my throat, it did not fill it. The most surprising thing to me was how quickly I learnt to suppress the gag reflex. It was during this training that I discovered a wonderful way (for me) to take the dildo in. I tied the dildo to the vertical column of some built-in shelves, at mouth height when I was wearing my highest heels. Then with stockings tied to my nipple clamps I fed them around the column and pulled. This pulled my body forward forcing me to take the dildo deeper. The feeling of the pull on my nipples as the dildo was entering my mouth and then throat was incredible. I was essentially tricking my mind into thinking that I was being turned on by taking the dildo deep into my mouth. For a couple of weeks I could not get enough of doing this. As is always the case with me, I wanted more. 

Off to the adult store again to get a larger dildo. This time eight inches. Once I got back I put the old and the new alongside each other, and was staggered by how much bigger the new one was. Suddenly I thought I had probably bitten off more than I could chew. But never one to refuse a challenge I got myself setup again, but this time with the larger dildo tied to the shelving column. I applied the clamps, put the tip of the dildo inside my mouth and started to pull on the stockings tied to the clamps. Further and further the dildo penetrated my mouth until I could feel it against the back of my throat. It seemed to be stuck and I looked down to see that there was still quite a bit of the dildo protruding in front of my lips. I pulled harder on the stockings and felt the dildo suddenly move further in. It seemed to have forced its way past a narrow point. A bit more pulling and I knew the dildo was definitely in my throat because I could not breath, not even through my nose. So many fantasy thoughts started coming to mind. Being forced into a position like this by a strong woman. She decided if I take another breath. My excitement level was incredible. I was actually deepthroating and I was getting very aroused whilst doing it. It felt like a whole new world might be opening up to me.

I started to think more on being trapped in such a situation, and by coincidence, stumbled upon a gif that showed a woman with a dildo partially inserted in her mouth. Attached to her collar were several heavy duty springs - the other end of which were attached in front of her, but beyond the base of the dildo. She was pulling hard on the springs. Suddenly she gave in and the springs pulled her head forward sending the dildo deep within her. She rested a little in that position gathering enough strength to again fight the springs and pull the dildo out of her throat. The springs were too strong for her to pull back far enough to get the dildo completely out of her mouth. I wanted to have this sort of experience - desperately.

I knew I could not create the device myself, but had to create a similar situation. I repeated my earlier method but with an extra final touch. Once I had pulled my body in by the nipples, I tied the ends of the stockings together behind my neck. When I tried to pull my head back the stockings now fought directly against that movement. I was able to pull back enough to get the dildo out of my throat, and was able to get some breath. The stockings were trying to force me back onto the dildo, so I felt that I had created the scenario I was seeking. The second time I pulled out, I pulled harder and was actually able to get my mouth completely off the dildo. That was very disappointing. Even though my hands were free and I could cease this game anytime I wished, I was hoping that my neck would be held strongly enough that I could not get free from the dildo. I decided that the stockings had to be pulled tighter before I tied them off.

I decided on another addition for my next attempt. Once everything was in place, I put my hood on. This was a leather hood which was secured with lacing at the back as well as straps and buckles. I had to leave the mouthpiece off and not secure the under-chin strap in order to be able to insert the dildo. It took about 10 minutes to get the hood on, and it takes a few minutes to get it off as well. With the hood on, I am completely blinded and my hearing is significantly impacted. I did a few test runs, using the stockings attached to my nipples to pull me onto the dildo. The first couple of goes were just until the dildo reached the back of my throat, then I did a couple of full length insertions reminding myself of just how extreme this game was. Breathing was simply not possible with the dildo inserted balls deep.

I took a deep breath and pulled myself onto the dildo again, this time intending to tie the stockings quite tightly behind my neck. I had to find that point where I could pull back enough to be able to breathe but not to be able to get off the dildo completely. I started to tie a double slip knot where I thought it was the correct tightness. Part way through tying the knot, I felt hands on my hands, followed by a body leaning against mine holding me against the shelving column. One hand took my right hand and lowered it to my side then let go. I immediately started to raise that hand, but it was slapped quite hard, causing me to drop it down again. I raised it again. Again it was slapped, even harder this time. I got the message and left it down. My mind was racing in contradiction. Was I actually going to be living out a fantasy situation, or was I in mortal danger. I was extremely frightened, but I could feel that my cock was trying to break my cage.

My left hand was lowered to my side. I did not bother to try and raise it. Next I felt the stockings being tightened behind my neck again. It felt tighter than I was going to tie them, but it was done quickly. The body moved away from me. I took the chance to pull my head back, easing off the cock a little. I could get far enough back to be able to breathe, but only just, and it was taking all my neck strength to be able to do that. I took a breath at the first opportunity, but within seconds I had to stop pulling back and again take the full length of the dildo. I stayed fully on the dildo for as long as I could before pulling back for another breath. That was so difficult, but obviously I had to do it. When I pulled back the dildo was still touching the back of my throat, it just was not completely blocking it. I repeated this about half a dozen times and decided I had experienced my fantasy and wanted out. So I started to raise my hands toward the back of my neck. My right hand received another hard slap, reminding me that I was not alone. I had actually forgotten! I dropped my hands in response to the slap. At the same time a hand was placed on the back of my head and I was pushed very forcefully back onto the dildo. I thought I had it fully inserted before, but this was now a new level. My nose was squashed quite painfully against the column and I could tell that the dildo was further down my throat. I started to raise a hand in protest, or to try and free myself somehow, but as soon as I started to move my hand the pressure on the back of my head was increased again. I was smart enough to understand the signal.

I left my hands by my side, and the hand was removed from my head. 

I repeated the breathe - deep throat - breathe cycle several more times. I have no idea how many iterations I did. Each time I was finding it harder and harder to pull back, and also was retching more and more as the dildo moved in my throat. Eventually I failed to control the gag reflex as I pulled back one time and what felt like a liter of saliva erupted from my mouth and nostrils. It was similar to throwing up, but there were none of the deep down muscular contractions. This was just happening from the throat upwards. Somehow I managed to hold my head back for a fraction longer this time needing a little longer to get a good breath in. I was starting to worry that soon I would not have enough strength to pull back against the tied stockings. Then I felt the hands on me again, this time on my sides, moving around to my tummy and down inside my panties. When they reached my cage, there was a slight jump by the body behind me. I suppose the cage was an unexpected discovery. Next thing, I can feel the stockings being untied - and then nothing. After a short while, I slowly started to raise my hand, expecting to be slapped, but it did not happen. I took this as a signal that I could use my hands to finish removing the stockings from behind my neck. Once I had done that, I pulled myself off the dildo completely, and leant forward against the column. I was spent and needed a rest. After a little while I moved towards a chair which I hoped was still in its usual position. I had to feel my way along the shelves as the hood still prevented me from seeing. I got to the chair and sat down. I was too exhausted to even bother about the hood. I just sat there slumped for quite some time. Eventually I felt sufficiently recovered to start the relatively lengthy process of removing the hood. Once that was off and I had blinked many times to get accustomed to light again, I looked around for the intruder. No one there.

My feet had had enough of the extreme heels by now, so I decided it was time to get changed, have a drink, and head home. I could do the thinking about what had just happened when I laid down tonight. I removed the heels and went to grab my jeans, but they were not where I had left them. In fact, I could not see any of my boy clothes anywhere. I thought as hard as I was capable and was certain that I had gotten undressed at this chair and my clothes and shoes should be right there next to the chair. Clearly they were not.

Suddenly it occurred to me that whoever had joined in my play briefly had decided to move them. I began to search around the shop for them when my phone pinged, signifying an incoming text message.

"You should be more careful when you decide to play. Leaving the back door unlocked was a big mistake." 

To be continued.


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